A dying friend

A few days ago I found out a very dear friend is dying of cancer. I knew her and played tennis with her several years ago when she went through her first bout with breast cancer. She was so positive and courageous that I immediately looked to her as an example to follow when my father became terminally ill and died of lung cancer. Whether she knew it or not, she was a source of strength for me during a very hard time of my life.

Today I found out that my friend is no longer eating and is drinking very little. Her family has asked for no visitors and I suspect the end is very near. Although I'm sad I haven't been able to say goodbye to her this isn't something I'm devastated about. She's my friend and I will honor her wishes and express my grief in other ways.

Now for the atheist in me to discuss a few things surrounding her impending death that is bothering me. When I say this is bothering me I mean that I've had to keep my opinions to myself and be respectful of some of the strange things mutual friend Ruth has said to me about this dying friend. Ruth is in her late 70's and is a life long Catholic. That is the context. She mentioned that our dying friend will be a source of comfort and will be able to take prayers when she is on the other side. I tried to convey my thoughts in a different way, by voicing my love for her as she is in this world, in this reality, and not in a supernatural way. I mentioned that if I wasn't able to be here (if she died while I was gone visiting family) then I wanted Ruth to know that I will be here in spirit and to convey that to others if appropriate.