Monday, March 26, 2007

My "ah-ha" moment

My atheism was a gradual process, as most atheists seem to report, but I did have an "ah-ha" moment.

My father had been diagnosed with lung cancer and the family email list was full of prayer requests. I had long ago stopped believing in the power of prayer, but with each failed prayer I was amazed that my family members didn't get it. The same time they were wasting their time praying I was on medical sites researching what to expect from each test my father was going through. With 100% accuracy I was able to predict what each test result would be while each prayer request had 0% success rate. Science proved itself once again to be a better friend to me than religion.

One day I was having dinner with DH and suddenly it occurred to me: I'm an atheist. It was wonderful and exhilarating. I finally found my niche! Out of my mouth to my husband I exclaimed, "I'm an atheist." With my father dying and all this religious shit going on around me his reply was priceless: "Well, you're timing's pretty bad, don't you think?"

I found dealing with my father's illness and death much easier to take and understand as an atheist. I'll explain later in my next post.

6 comments:

tina FCD said...

You sound so much like me. We are probably totally different in reality though. Growing up, I never thought much about religion.I'll get more into that later. I love this post and can relate to it so well, mine was a gradual process also but a quick one. My son is my teacher, in respect to opening my eyes. I have a link on my blog to his blog. I wanted to post his 360 link but not sure if I should. I'll definitely be back.

tina FCD said...

Do you think you could give me some insight as to why people NEED religion? Just curious.

Unknown said...

I have pretty much been agnostic. Yet, toying around with belief systems in some shape or form. Christianity, Wicca, Qabala and/or whatever New Age philosophy caught my eye at the time.

What brought me to atheism was politics. You may ask: "Politics?"

Yep, more so than anything else, the separation of church and state has driven me to atheism.

Another factor is evangelism. People trying to shove an ideology down my throat that I was more than capable of figuring out myself (this completely turns me off).

In my opinion, I think that I am more than able to figure out what is right for yours truly regardless of what others entreat me to be the "right" way.

I guess my point is this: free thought is a greater blessing than conforming to a viewpoint (in a wholehearted/no-questions-asked) attitude.

Essentially, this is what separates the shepherd from the sheep.

Unknown said...

Oh, my best wishes go out to you and your family.

tina FCD said...

Hey! There's my "teacher" Larro!

Sean Wright said...

I had an a-ha moment as well. I have blogged a little about my journey but essentially i moved from Catholicism through some new age rubbish to Buddhism, then Buddhism without religious trappings to the point of being an Atheist with an interest in Buddhist philosophy. The a-ha moment occured a couple of chapters into "The God Delusion" where i'd realised I had been an atheist for a little while, i just had not acknowledged it to myself.