From my previous blog entries it sounds like I might be a little angry. That would be a good assumption, but I do recognize that my parents thought they were doing right by raising their children with what they thought were Christian values. Brother and I (separated by 5-1/2 years) found our way out of the confines of that religion but Sister wasn't as lucky.
Why did my sister choose a different route than my brother and me? I've read a little about this but I think some of it can be explained by birth order and personality types. I'm the oldest and a non-conformist. I like being around people but I'm most comfortable by myself. I question all authority figures and had a difficult childhood because of this trait. As a child I felt my parents were not qualified to raise us and I still feel that way.
My sister is 18 months behind me. She witnessed first hand the problems I had with our parents and figured a better way. She actually got away with a lot more bad behavior because the focus was constantly on me. I hated this immensely but never felt complied to tell on her. I was not her keeper and didn't want the job. She was a people pleaser, saying what everyone wanted her to say, and not admitting to anything bad. I remember admiring her at some level and I never felt animosity toward her. She was a different person than me and was able to get through the minefields better. Good for her.
I do have to add that in her late 20's a huge emotional blow was dealt her. Brother and I think that she sought solace within a Baptist church and found that community comforting. She then remarried a few years later and started a family. I think that also contributed to her religiosity.
My brother was much younger than me and was not on my radar. He got away with much more than either of us. To be honest, I think I wore our parents out and they didn't have much energy to deal with, what they discovered later, to be minor problems. After HS he joined the military and began questioning his beliefs. In fact about 10 years ago he asked me to look up religious stuff on the Internet but unfortunately I wasn't ready to question my God-belief. Years later my brother and I, after following similar paths, converged to give each other support and information.
He's been one of my best friends ever since. I would've never thought it possible. Thanks Bro!
4 comments:
Your birth-order analysis is interesting. I wonder how it will play out with my own possums. Hopefully, none of them will rebell towards theism. LOL
I like the way you present your blogs....easy to understand. I have been looking for other peoples blogs to go to and comment on. I'm glad you commented on my blog, thank you. I love your story of growing up and how you tried to deal with your upbringing. Your blog just inspired me to write a new blog. But my situation was far different than yours growing up.Well, in the religion aspect.
I wanted to say to your brother, bravo! for being there for you.
My sister is slowly coming around. She has just got engaged and as not planning a church wedding.
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